By Victor Ochieng’
vochieng.90@gmail.com
Chief Principal at Ambassador Pamela Mboya Girls, an Extra County school in Homa-bay County, Mrs. Margaret Temesi is one of the principals with good comprehension of guidance and counselling.
In my sporadic visits to this school at the sultry shores of Lake Lolwe, I have seen this pious and pleasant principal employing basic counselling skills to help students and staff in the school which was started by the late Homa-bay Senator Otieno Kajwang.’
Ideally, the school was started to immortalise Ambassador Pamela Mboya – the better half of the legendary leader from Rusinga Island – Tom Mboya – the spell-binding orator.
Principals who are counsellors par excellence turn out to be effective and efficient managers since they steer schools towards the shores of stunning success.
Mrs. Temesi, who holds Master’s degree in Counselling Psychology, admits that she is a great administrator at Ambassador Pamela Mboya Girls because she served for long as the Head of Department of the Guidance and Counselling at Sacred Heart Girls in Mukumu, Kakamega County; and she is a pious principal who welds professional and pastoral counselling while attending to students and staff.
Basically, there are several counselling skills that peerless principals like Mrs. Temesi employ in effective and efficient management of schools.
Social skills in counselling like greetings, gentleness, politeness, kindness and compassion, help principals to break the ice; and to establish rapport with students and staff. Theodore Roosevelt put it aptly, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
Principals cannot provide legendary leadership in schools with inflated egos. Arguably, some schools witness spate of strikes because they are steered by principals who are full of hubris – excess self-confidence and pride.
Principals who are pious are wise and not otherwise. Wisdom, which is the right application of knowledge and plenty of common sense; makes them know that people who are not humble stumble those who don’t practise humility get humiliated.
In James 4:6, we read that God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Also, in James 4:10, the good book says: Humble yourself before the Lord, and He will lift you.
Principals who are sensitive like Mrs. Temesi put puissance on counselling skills like reflection of feelings, empathy, Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR), deep listening and self-disclosure.
Principals deal with students and staff who have feelings. Human beings are animated animals who are sensitive and emotive.
In order to get along with them, the principal must be an astute student of Daniel Goleman, who has written widely and wildly on Emotional Intelligence and Social Intelligence.
There is empathy, which goes beyond sympathy. When you are sympathetic, you feel for someone in misery and misfortune. But empathy makes you to conjure ways to fit in the person’s shoe.
Empathy is the ability to understand what another person is experiencing, and to communicate that understanding. Simon Sinek in treasure trove titled Leaders Eat Last talks about empathy at an epic degree.
Empathy is not just psychological, but also spiritual. Nehemiah while holed up in exile heard about woes and worries of his people. He wept, prayed, fasted, and did more – acted. He embarked on the journey to Jerusalem, to (re)build ruined walls.
Also, principals like Mrs. Temesi focus on Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR). In schools, students and staff make mistakes which calls for the attention and concentration of principals.
There is no way the principal can offer hope and help yet s/he is (de)void of UPR. The student who is impudent can be corrected. The teacher who has missed the mark can be taken back to the right track. UPR is the right attitude the counsellor has towards the client. It involves accepting, respecting and being non-judgemental.
There is need for deep listening. Principals like Mrs. Temesi know that they have to listen to students and staff. Or else, chaos can erupt like active volcanoes. Principals who are good listeners curb strikes.
Through deep listening, they employ open-door policies, where students walk straight to their offices, and offer ‘intelligence’. Such principals encourage school barazas, class and house assemblies, where assertive students express grievances without victimisation. The ubiquity of suggestion boxes in the school, also depict that principals are ready to listen to students, by reacting to pressing issues penned.
Lastly, principals like Mrs. Temesi bank on self-disclosure to help students and staff grows and glow. In the best counselling practices, self-disclosure is the ability of counsellors to share their experiences with clients on relevant issues. Principals can bank on this, because most of them are senior citizens who are rife with life experiences worth sharing.
The writer is a motivational speaker and trainer.
